Sunflowers

I hate being so small and people thinking they can run me over.
I hate knowing at any moment I could get a call telling me my grandfather has died.
I hate seeing my dad get drink after drink and girl after girl looking for happiness.
I hate not being able to communicate with my downsyndrome brother.
I hate knowing I'll never see my mother again.
I hate that my brother and sister I do live with treat me more as a mother.
I hate that I haven't had a summer break since I was 14.
I hated missing out on my teenage years because I was taking care of my household.
I hate that at 21 I can't live on my own because the bills I help my family pay are more than my rent would be.
I hate that even alone I don't let myself cry.
I hate that I hate showing weakness, even when it's JUST ME.

I do, however, love the Lord enough to walk in His plan all the days of my life.