I've put myself through a lot. After my mother died, my dad was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. He was always yelling, and losing his temper over the smallest things. I became terrified of anyone who would raise their voice. I felt like everything was my fault. I began taking it out on myself. I started drinking and doing drugs to keep my mind off of things, and when that didn't work I caused more harm. I stopped eating and also began cutting myself. It got to the point of if I ate I would cut on my stomach because I hated the way I looked, mind you at this time I was 16-17ish and weighed 98 pounds. If someone raises their voice, or my anxiety got bad I would slit my arm or even burn myself. I felt like that was the only way to "release" what I was feeling. Boy, was i wrong.
Because of that I have anxiety over just about everything and at 21 I'm still working on myself. I haven't self harmed myself in about 8 months. And I wake up everyday with the mindset of God has given me freedom and I don't have to walk under oppression.
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